Winamp - it really whips the llama's ass!
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Why did the programmer drown?... Because he shouted "F1! F1!" and no one could understand him.
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Real hacker's attack vectors are normalized.
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How do you know when you're really in incognito mode? ... Your browser turns into a Word document.
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The programmer forgot to update Java, so he went to the coffee shop to get a fresh one.
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We sent a web developer to the store to get The Times newspaper. He came back with The Times New Roman.
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Why did the computer keep sneezing?... It had a virus!
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Cookie Monster loves browser cookies.
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Literate programming vs shell one-liners. Who will win?!
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127.0.0.1 sweet 127.0.0.1.
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Front end vs back end.
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I had a life once. Now I have a computer.
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~ sweet ~
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A SEO couple had twins. For the first time they were happy with duplicate content.
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"Computers are useless. They can only give you answers." - Pablo Picasso
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Computers are like air conditioners. They work fine until you start opening windows.
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An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, inn, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drink, drinks, beer, alcohol...
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Web developers keep confusing The Times newspaper with the Times New Roman font.
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How do you generate a random string? ... Put a web designer in front of VIM and tell him to save and exit.
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Expectation vs. reality.
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Jeff Bezos: "Alexa, buy me berries from Whole Foods!" Alexa: "Ok, Jeff, I just bought Whole Foods."
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Day vs night.
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Scheme programming hide and seek championship.
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An empty Internet browser is an automatic admission of guilt.
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Why do Java developers wear glasses? ... Because they don't C#.
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If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the Universe.
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There are eight hobbits in a hobbyte.
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4:04 AM. Sleep not found.
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Modern Web Development.
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Debugging is the art of extracting the needles from the haystack.
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My grandpa never got to experience the Internet. Not because he was too old, but because he used Internet Explorer.
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What do you call a programmer from Sweden?... A Nerdic!
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Debugging is like finding a needle in the haystack.
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Greek cows say μ.
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C++ hide and seek championship.
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Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands.
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Merry browserful Christmas and Happy browserful New Year 2017!
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ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.
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3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510...
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ASCII a silly question, get a silly ANSI.
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Two robots meet. The first robot asks, "Are you ill?" The second robot replies, "No, just feeling a bit off."
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DOM and jQuery.
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We'd like to name him James. That names is already taken! Try James375 or James2099.
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EA Programming Team
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.periodic { display: table }
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The only person awake at 3am.
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How do programming champions start their programs?... int result[500000];
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What did the devops guy say?... Let's run Docker in Vagrant on EC2. Fifteen minute deploys are OK!
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What did the typographer say to the printer who wouldn't stop talking?... Get to the point!
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#pisa-tower { font-style: italic; }
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Two fonts meet in Rome. One asks, "Are you a Roman, too?" "No," the other responds, "but I'm an Italic!"
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How do programmers order for refreshments?... They press F5!
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How do coders like their burgers?... With chips!
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Web design is a lot like Vegas. What happens below the fold stays below the fold.
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There are two major products that came out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We do not believe this to be a coincidence.
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Computer science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
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Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
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Happy Ada Lovelace day!
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Happy 26th birthday, Linux!
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What you thought great hackers look like vs. what they really are like.
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Give me the command line and I shall move the world.
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Software debugging is like finding the hay in the needle stack.
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It's always harder than you think.
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Web developers always have trouble finding room 404.
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The never ending war.
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Front End vs Back End.
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Lisp isn't a language, it's a building material.
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Everyone's preferred browser.
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The creator.
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Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.
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Removing the needles from the haystack.
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#ie { break-inside: auto; }
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The hungriest browser.
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Light travels 1 foot in 1 nanosecond.
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Boom! Tetris for Jonas!
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LISP programming hide and seek championship.
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Debugging programs on infinite tapes isn't easy.
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A machine that turns coffee into code.
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Eight bytes walk into a bar. The barman asks, "Can I get you anything?" The bytes reply, "Yeah, make us a double!"
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What do you call a programmer from Finland?... A Nerdic!
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#titanic { position: absolute; bottom: 0; } .iceberg { display: block; }
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Partying with browsers is a bad idea.
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Merry browsery Christmas and Happy browsery New Year 2017!
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Programming hide and seek championship.
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Only the strong survive.
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UNIX - LIVE FREE OR DIE
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PS. I love you!
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ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.
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#minecraft { display: block; }
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Tom and Jerry.
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2.71828182845904523536028747135266249775724709369995...
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When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
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Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, "Are you ill?" The second byte replies, "No, just feeling a bit off."
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We'd like to name him Peter. That names is already taken! Try Peter375 or Peter2099.
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.lego { display: block; }
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Internet Explorer is one of the slowest tools for downloading Opera.
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.periodic { display: table; }
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Knock knock! Race condition. Who's there?!
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Happy 25th Birthday, Linux!
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.ghost { color: white; opacity: 0.1; }
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Programmers are the only people awake at 3am.
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Why did the programmer drown?... Because he shouted "F1! F1!" and no one could understand him.
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Coffee in, code out.
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Best code is written applying candy in, code out (CICO) principle.
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FORTRAN programming class.
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#big-bang::before { content: ""; }
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Front end vs Back end.
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The only thing Internet Explorer is good for is downloading Firefox.
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.ninja{visibility: hidden; color: black;}
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#europe .country {border:none;}
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Fear - display none - CSS pun.
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A test engineer walks into a bar and orders... test1 asdfasdf beertest testtesttest 111111 beer 484.
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Real hacker's attack vectors are normalized.
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IE CSS Joke: .rip { bottom: -6ft; }
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Winamp player - it really whips the llama's ass!
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How do web developers order for refreshments?... They press F5!
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There are only 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
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Why did the web designer drown?... He had too many anchors.
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Why did the web programmer drown?... She didn't know if she should float left or float right.
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The fight still goes on in 2018.
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Literate programming vs shell one-liners. Who will win?!
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Home (127.0.0.1) sweet home (127.0.0.1).
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Donald Knuth and literate programming vs. Douglas McIlroy and UNIX one-liners.
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Modern Web Development
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An SEO couple had twins. For the first time they were happy with duplicate content.
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~ sweet ~
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I had a life once. Now I have a computer.
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#titanic { float: none; }
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::1 sweet ::1.
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How do programmers like their burgers?... With chips.
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Why was the computer cold?... It left its Windows open!
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Why didn't The Terminator upgrade to Windows 10?... Because he still loves Vista, baby!
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What does a computer scientist wear on Halloween?... A bit mask.
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Browserful Christmas and Browserful New Year 2018!
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COBOL programming class.
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127.0.0.1 sweet 127.0.0.1.
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There's a band called 1023MB. They haven't had a gig yet.
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Keyboard not found... Press F1 to continue.
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4:04 AM. Sleep not found.
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What do you call 8 hobbits?... A hobbyte.
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Knock knock... Who's there?... ... very long pause ... Java!
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There's no place like ::1.
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Why did the computer keep sneezing? ... It had a virus!
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Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas? ... Because Oct 31 == Dec 25!
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There are two major products that came out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We do not believe this to be a coincidence. (BSD Daemon used with permission.)
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How do you generate a random string? ... Put a web designer in front of VIM and tell him to save and exit.
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Why did the web developer leave the restaurant? ... Because of the table layout.
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How do you know when you're really in incognito mode? ... Your browser turns into a Word document.
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Why did the Italian chef fail his web coding class? ... He wrote spaghetti from scratch.
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Computer science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes.
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end vs. Back end.
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Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
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Computers are useless. They can only give you answers.
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Internet Explorer goes shopping. An employee asks, "Do you need help?" Internet Explorer responds, "No. Just browsing."
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We sent a web developer to the store to get The Times newspaper. He came back with The Times New Roman.
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There's no place like 127.0.0.1.
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Happy Ada Lovelace day!
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An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, inn, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drink, drinks, beer, alcohol...
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What was the web developer doing in the bathroom? ... Taking a crop.
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Computers are like air conditioners. They work fine until you start opening windows.
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An empty Internet browser's history is an automatic admission of guilt.
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Before the Internet, Cookie Monster was the only way to get rid of cookies.
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The programmer forgot to update Java, so he went to the coffee shop to get a fresh one.
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Internet Explorer does a great job of downloading Chrome.
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web page checked into a hotel. It was given room 404 and was never found since.
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While humans have to pay for each drink at the bar, a web browser can just open a tab.
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What did Times New Roman say to Comic Sans? - I hate your type!
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A web developer left a restaurant before ordering because he hated the menus. They were fold-outs and he prefers drop-downs.
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My grandma never got to experience the Internet. Not because she was too old, but because she used Internet Explorer web browser.
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